One reason we resist forgiving is that we don’t really understand what forgiveness is or how it works. We think we do, but we don’t.
* Forgiveness is not letting the offender off the hook.
* Forgiveness does not mean we must continue to be the victim.
* Forgiveness is not the same as reconciling. We can
forgive someone even if we cannot bring ourselves to get along with them again.
* Forgiveness is a process, not an event.
* Forgetting does not mean denying reality or ignoring
repeated offenses.
* Forgiveness is not based on others’ actions but on our attitude and state of mind.
* Withholding forgiveness is a refusal to let go of perceived power.
* Be careful not to forgive too quickly in order to avoid pain or, worse, to manipulate the situation.
* Watch that you are not simply covering up the wounds and holding back the necessary healing process.
* Forgiveness does not mean forgetting.
* Forgiveness starts with a mental decision. The emotional part of forgiveness is finally being able to let go of the resentment.

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